Friday, February 13, 2015

A Visible and Ever Present Reminder

Today's post is more personal. It's not about the intricacies of proper theological nuances. It's a post about the most visible and ever present reminder of God's goodness to me in this life. This is a post about my wife, Tricia, to whom I have been married for twenty-three years. I chose this time to write about her in particular because her birthday is on Valentine's Day.

As I reflect on the gift God has given me in my wife, I can say without hesitation that one thing I am thankful to see in her is a desire to love and serve the Lord and rest upon Him in all she does. Let me illustrate it this way using a familiar Old Testament story. When Moses would come before the Lord and then returned to the people, his face shone with a reflection of the glory of the Lord. Perhaps you know of people in your life who you could just tell from the countenance of his or her face that this person clearly was one who frequently sought to be in the Lord's presence; their face had a certain "glow" about it that is hard to describe. This is what I see with great frequency on my wife's countenance.... a face that has been with her "Father who is in secret" (Matt. 6:6). Such a countenance inevitably spills over in blessed ways to the rest of our home as well as the various places where we have served.

This naturally leads to her servant heart. Tricia has such a willingness to serve in whatever situation in which we find ourselves. Whenever she sees something that needs to be done, she does it. Willingly and wholeheartedly. There have been numerous times when she simply and willingly helped without being asked - even with the more mundane tasks for events at our Church or at the Seminary where I attended. So much of the service in which she engages is behind the scenes, frequently out of the sight of everyone else. Why? I'll answer it rather simply: she loves God's people. She wants to bless her brothers and sisters in Christ in whatever ways she can. As a result, she tends to avoid the spotlight and does not like undue attention brought to her.

Since she loves her brothers and sisters in Christ, she looks for various ways to uplift and encourage them in the various circumstances they might find themselves. This is part of the reason she started her blog in order to give hints, advice, examples, etc., about hospitality and homemaking. As she posts there on various topics, she seeks to ground the specifics upon the general biblical principles that are timeless. I have been thankful to see the positive response from many of her friends and even friends of friends - thankful that she has been a blessing and a help for so many and for so long.

Now imagine what it would do to someone like my wife who loves to serve and help people to be told by someone else (with status & position) that "you think you can help people, but you can't." Well, sadly that happened to her about seven years ago in a somewhat public setting. This and many other hurtful things were said to and about her; it crushed her spirit. For years, I have been tenderly trying to help her overcome those false and hurtful words. And yet she still served others and still loved others. At one point when we had been in South Carolina only a short time and I had just started seminary, she said to me that she was afraid to get her feet wet in the pool again (metaphor for serving) as she might get hurt again. I responded to her that she was already more than waist deep! Despite the pain, despite her crushed spirit, she was still serving and loving others. Her inner strength and resolve is a lot stronger than she admits..... all on account of God's sustaining and sanctifying work in her life.

It is in our home where she shines and I cannot state enough that I am a blessed man. She strives to make our home a peaceful place for our whole family. The two of us are teaching our children to love and serve others and to love Christ's church. This home is a haven and that is due in no small part to Tricia's hard work and love for all of us. In one sense, I am somewhat selfishly glad that I do not have a study in a church building - my study is at home and I really like it that way!

I truly am blessed to have Tricia as my wife. She takes her role as a wife seriously and endeavors to conform to the biblical role set forth in Scripture. She is a far better wife than I deserve and to be honest, I have not always treated her as the fine china that she is, the wonderful gift that she is. She loves me despite myself. The Lord has used her as an instrument in my own sanctification as she prays for me, challenges me to be Christ-like, encourages me, and supports me in my ministry. My friends, behind every good man is a great wife, so be thankful for your wife and continue to nurture her, be tender and meek toward her, and love her as Christ loved the church.